why I believe in God

Consider these converging lines of evidence:

1. The starting pitchers of tomorrow night’s Game 1 of the World Series are the last recipients of the American League Cy Young Award, an award they won while pitching for the Cleveland Indians—the team which apparently did not inform their brand-new manager of those trades, for he said yesterday that he was “looking forward to bringing a championship to Cleveland,” thereby proving that he has never lived in Cleveland.

2. The Browns are the only Cleveland team that has won a championship in my lifetime, a feat they accomplished shortly after they moved to Baltimore.

3. Our near misses have names:  the Drive, the Shot, the Fumble, and the Departure (LeBron, 2010).

4. Our sharp-shooting and mostly Christian Cavs team of the early 90’s would have won a championship if not for the emergence of Michael Jordan.  Now that we have the new MJ, his championship run has been derailed by a fine Christian and his band of shooters in Orlando.

5. The Cavs think they have located their missing piece in Shaquille O’Neal, who rather than work on the weakness in his game (hint:  there’s a reason that Hack-a-Shaq works), spends his summer getting “shallaqued” by stars in other sports.

I could go on, but there is enough here to convince Christopher Hitchens (though not Richard Dawkins, that guy is crazy) that all of this could not have happened by accident.  If there was no God, then certainly a Cleveland team would have won something in my lifetime, before they skipped town.  The only logical conclusion has its own website:  http://godhatesclevelandsports.blogspot.com.

So c’mon atheists and agnostics, get your heads out of the sand.  You don’t need any more evidence for God’s existence.  When Paul said that everyone knows there is a God (Rom. 1:18-23), he wasn’t talking about a sensus divinitatis or inferring God’s existence from rocks and trees—he was talking about Cleveland (sensus plenior).  Repent before a similar curse falls upon you.


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7 responses to “why I believe in God”

  1. Jonathan Shelley

    Mike:

    Perhaps you should think about incorporating this argument into your apologetics course this J-Term. I think you could do a wonderful lesson on a “Cleveland” theodicy.

  2. godhatesclevelandsports

    I like your argument!

  3. Craig Hurst

    Ha ha ha..I love it!

  4. just to clarify,

    without Michael Jordan, the “Christian Cavs” of the 90s wouldn’t have won any championships. The Detroit “Bad Boys” would have just won a few more.

    other than that, i agree, and wonder why you didn’t mention the 1997 World Series.

  5. Don’t pull that bait-and-switch crap crap with me. Intriguing post title and then some <> sports talk.

  6. Ripped from the headlines!! This should help.

    Speaking of the Yankees:

    “New York’s eight seasons without a championship was the third-longest stretch for the Yankees since their first one, following gaps of 17 (1979-95) and 14 (1963-76).”

  7. I couldn’t help but think of you when I read this article…even non-Christians recognize that God has it in for Cleveland.

    http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmonsnflpicks/091204

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